In sexual role-playing, the more immersive and believable the scenario, the better. Transforming the reality is about a lot more than costumes, scripts, or location. Role play is 90 percent mental. For both partners, achieving the proper headspace is the single most important factor for enjoyable, believable scenes.
So how does one achieve this? Like anything else, practice makes perfect. As you and your partner get more comfortable with role-playing, you’ll both become more open and forthcoming with your fantasies and desires. Let go of your preconceived notions, know that you’re going to mess up and make mistakes along the way, and that’s ok. Using humor and keeping it fun will help to ease tensions and relax you both.
Decide your character and expound on it. What are they going to say and when? Are you using an accent? The more multi-faceted your character(s) are, the more believable they will be. Costumes and props can readily be found online or in thrift stores to complete the illusion.
Setting the scene is another integral part of the overall experience, and the “build up” to the act can be highly erotic in and of itself. Attempt to appeal to all the senses (touch, taste, smell, visual and auditory) to make your scene more authentic and memorable. Involving multiple locations and public play also helps to make the scene spicy. A leisurely dinner out with knowing winks, key phrases and groping under the table will make you blush while making you squirm in anticipation. The build-up to your roleplay scene can be weeks of teasing and play as to two of you create your theme.
Take your time learning what works best for you as a couple and don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zones. Role-playing is an incredibly creative and imaginative way to do this. Not only is it sexy and erotic, it’s just plain fun!:)
A Role Play My Way – Who Wants to Chat Right Now?
Sexual roleplay is a great way to spice up a long-term relationship or to kick-start a new one, I know because I have been an avid role-player for nearly two decades. For me, it started with an acting class that ended up becoming a community of swingers who shared an interest in mixing sex with a more theatrical tone. Not only is role-play fun and sexy, it can also greatly improve overall communication and intimacy with your partner or partners once you become polyamorous together. Once you’re comfortable, it doesn’t matter, how you chat?
Being a 43-year-old man, with a lot of experience in this arena, both good and bad, I think it would be very helpful to start by debunking some of the myths about sexual role play. So many newbies have been told complete nonsense by others who haven’t ever lived the lifestyle… and getting everyone to start from a common point of view makes meeting others in the scene so much easier and more enjoyable for everyone. Don’t worry, there is no exam at the end… unless you want to roleplay being a student and have me as your headmaster 😉
1. It’s perverse.
Not at all! In fact, studies show that up to 75 percent of couples have engaged in some form of roleplay. It’s a fun way to explore and learn each other’s desires.
2. It’s complicated.
Only if you want it to be. The scene you and your partner create can be as simple or elaborate as you choose. Costumes, scripts, and surroundings can enhance the immersive experience, or you can just use words and your imaginations.
3. My partner will judge me/ think I’m weird.
Doubtful. We all have fantasies. Discuss your and your partner’s fantasies in an honest and open way. Start slow and simple with something you both find arousing. Don’t be afraid to talk about your desires, and don’t be afraid to laugh. It will help to break any tension, easing you both into your chosen roles.
4. Role play always contains elements of BDSM.
BDSM! Nope. There are all kinds of role play dynamics. Teacher and student, doctor and patient, officer and civilian. There are age and pet play with one player taking the role of caregiver. The possibilities truly are limitless.
5. Role play will take the spice out of our “regular” sex life.
The truth is just the opposite. Openly communicating with your partner will enhance all aspects of your relationship and can greatly enhance your sexual intimacy.
6. Once roles are set, they’re permanent.
No way! You can be the doctor ( or nurse) in one scenario, and the patient in the next. Experimenting with different characters and themes is part of the appeal. Power exchanges can be incredibly hot.
So start communicating! Together you and your lover can create your own garden of carnal pleasure. The possibilities are endless. Have fun!